i have a relationship...with my phone.

having email on my phone is one of the most useful progressions since the invention of the internet
i can't go back. no way, no how.
i'm addicted.

traveling email has revolutionized my little side business as i can keep up with orders while we are out galavanting

but, as much as i love it, i hate it.
i can't seem to keep my mind away from it.
phone checkage is burned into my dna.
in the past few months (specifically since getting new email/internet savvy equipment) i've realized i need to change my horrifying check-happy habit...

specifically when in the presence of my little mini-me's

i turn my alerts to "calls only" (as much as it pains me to do so) and fight the urge to check my little digital friend if i see a message alert flashing.
such a little thing has a big impact.
choosing to refrain acctually frees me to focus more on real life things.
it's rather enlightening.

i've realized i hate what i look like when talking or texting in the presence of my kids.

i hate it because it bothers me when i see other people doing it...
(which means that i am acctually irritated at what i see in myself when it is reflected by someone else.)
as i watch a seemingly unattentive parent texting, i think to myself "wake up! your kid is crying, and you are answering a text! seriously!"
but then my own phone rings and i answer it. my kids start wizzing random items past my head and i have the nerve to wonder what's gotten into them.

so the real problem is me. and my phone.
as i sit here blogging, it's on my lap.
waiting. patiently.
it always waits. i love how it waits.

if only i could mimic it's stealthy patience.
perhaps i could ward off future my future impatience as i look for a moment i hide in the closet and check my email.

i'm afraid of twitter.

i don't know what it is
i just don't get it
maybe i don't want to get it, for fear that it will be one more unnecessary reason to check my phone.

it's like facebook, right?
people write status updates?
for being so savvy in the phone arena, i'm completely in the twitter dark ages.

are you all twittering about important things and i am missing out on secretive, fun and noteworthy conversations?

how does anyone find the time to twitter when there are little people twittering all around at all times?

even if i did decide to become a tweeter (seriously, that is the dumbest word, ever) i am so wordy that the twitter administrators would surely give me a minimum tweet quota that i would undoubtedly be unable to meet.
maybe the blogger administrators are considering the same thing :)



by the by

after all of our home improvements
after we finally did all of the things we have been wanting to do
after 5 days on the market....our house SOLD!!
after 3 years, we are ready for the next step.
though we are not exactly sure what the next step will be...for once, i'm staying calm.
after all these years (31) it's about time that i learn a thing called 'calm'


now this is love.

10:27 pm. our front yard.
the only visible lighting is our dim portch globe that hasn't been serviced by our community staff since the mid 80's.

i went all HGTV earlier that morning, purchasing a few clearance items at The Christmas Tree Shop with big plans to refubish them into something fabulous.

clint walked outside to find me hunched over, perched in a large pile of snow, black spray paint can in hand. drifting speckles of semi gloss paint floated in every direction, surely wafting into every crevis within a 500 yard range.

as my plastic medical gloves were attempting to manouver a hidiously pale cream 6' shelving unit into it's proper paint position, i looked up like a ravenous raccon to spy clint's inquisitive look. my crazy hair strayed wildly out of my side sliding pony tail and the old doctor's scrub pants i was sporting (now covered in black paint smudges) only added to my "doctor gone crazy" attire.

"what in the world are you doing out here? you can't even see anything!" he said.

"i need to go a little crazy tonight. you just have to let me go crazy." i stated in my half-frazzled/half calm voice.

he smiled and walked back inside.

now that, my friends, is love.

his knowing i need to expend some of my frustrations on an unsuspecting piece of reject furnature is one of the many reasons i love him.

side post to my original post, which was written last week, but i never had time to post it.

the original shelf project led to an entire house re-work.
amazing what a little shelf can do :)
i forgot to take a "before" picture of the bookshelf...must have been the paint fumes :)
just picture a horrendously scratched and frightningly pale white-creme-almost blush tone. ugh

to give you the full gammot, i'll start with the before pics from when we moved in (3 years ago) and bring you up to the present.  

the day we moved in:

before the bookshelf:

after the bookshelf (or should i say "now"):
still not sure what exactly to put on said bookshelf? still deciding :)
notice a lack of something?
yes. toys. they are now safely stowed in the playroom. here's the history...

clint finishing the unfinished future playroom:

descreet, organized, perfection. i wonder how long it will look like this?? my guess is, not long :)
so, rearrainging the living room and the playroom caused me to rearrainge the dining room:
the day we moved in:
just had to add these for dramatic effect...tearing down the wall between the kitchen and dining room and after:

dining room before the bookshelf makover:

now: (much, MUCH better!)

oh, and the downstairs transformation inspired me to transform my sewing/random storage/misc dumping ground room. as embarrasing as it may be to show it to the blog world the messiest room in our house, the finished product is now my favorite room in the house...
after: (ahh, perfection!)
(did i meantion that clint and i did the sewing/random storage/misc. duming ground transformation in one day? yes. we are amazing :)  but even more amazing, is the fact that we had almost all of these items already laying around the house! i only purchased the bird/flower squares above the bed (walmart $5 each), the pillows (walmart $6 x 2), and the curtains (walmart $15 x 2).

just one more. my favorite.
the black spray paint also transformed one of my favorite things and made it even more wonderful. my 2007 birthday gift from my mom: pottery barn wall organizers. i googlie-eyed them for a year, and she surprised me with them. now that their original wall is white, their off-white tone wasn't quite as fresh as i wanted.
enter spray paint and voiula! delicious!



one more thing.
since blogger doesn't have spell check built in (or if it does PLEASE tell me :)
i didn't have the energy to spell check all of this.
so, i'm sure you think i am totally illiterate with all of my many mispellings.
but now you know the real me.
i can't spell
but i sure can write 4 sentences about something that could have been said with 1 :)


did that really just happen?

we met some great friends at kerr park this morning and had a delightful time playing and chatting.

our friends headed home, so we decided to indulge the warm spring breeze with a leisurely walk beside the kerr park creek. we found man sized sticks to prod the lazy river along its course.
our walking and talking moved to perching.
we perched along the little creek bed and threw rocks, and went "fishing" with our sticks. slowly the boys shoes crept past the mud and into the shallow waters.

i thought to myself,
"what a cool mom i am! look at my adorable boys! i love their new shorts. i'm so glad foster wore his crocks today. perfect for our first creek walking. man, i hate crocks...but they sure are handy. i bet all the other moms are looking at us having so much fun wishing they were cool enough to let their kids play in the stream.
i am awesome."

it must have been my haughty attitude that prompted the next chain of disasterous events.

foster ventured forward with gusto. marching, splashing, adventurizing onward down the creekbed.

in true rowan fashion, rock throwing and stick poking was enjoyable, but cold water foot splashing was over the line. as i reached over the creekbed to pluck him out, my favorite flip flops (worn in honor of the first warm day) got a slosh of mud under their thongs. i was internally peeved, especially because i had worn my only pair of decent fitting jeans and they were dangerously close to my muddy sandals.

i looked up to find foster in a bit of distress about 50 ft down the creek.

"mom, my crock came off!"

"well, put it back on buddy! i don't want you walking in the creek without shoes!! there's rocks and stuff and who knows what else. please put your shoe back on!"

"but i can't! i'm stuck!"

"you can do it buddy. just put your shoe back on. right now please!'

"i need help mom!"

as our conversation transpired, rowan and i approached his location to find quite a new issue.
leg one was buried in what seemed to be a mixture of quick sinking mud and sand.
leg two (the one without the shoe) was dangling out of the water and quickly causing leg one to become unstable.

i could see his distress and sprung into action.

"buddy, it's ok. i'm going to come get you. you're ok buddy! hang on."

i put rowan and my water bottle down (newly purchased in a pack of 2 for the clearance price of $3 at target. i love it. very cute.) strapped on my bag, and rolled up my favorite jeans.

no sooner had my weight shifted into the creek bed, i realized i had a problem.
i immediately sank down 2 FEET into the mud!

my mind raced to forget all of the creatures that are currently mud dwellers, and i quickly stepped with my second foot to get closer to foster. it sank even farther down.

i stepped again and reached foster, but by now, both shoes were lost forever deep in the depths of mud.

"oh my goodness!!!! what are we going to do!!! my shoes are gone!!!" i shrieked.

i grabbed foster (one shoe in hand, the other shoe was now future fish food) and leaped up the other side of the creek wall.

rowan (still stranded on the other side) watching all of this transpire, heard my shriek, saw my LEGS AND JEANS COVERED in thick disgusting mud and all at once noticed he was alone on the other side of the creek. not good. he went ballistic.

foster was hysterically adamant about not wanting to leave his shoe behind in the mud. i could barely contain my own peril at the thought of myself walking back with no shoes let alone a child with one shoe, and another child overcome with mud terror.

i grabbed foster and jumped back into the mud and over to rowan's side of the creek.

we were now 1/4 mile from the car.

fyi: there is no grass in march. just dirt, sticks and a strange assortment of scratchy leaves. foster is 40 lbs. rowan is 28 lbs. i was barefoot. my children were beyond hungry (it was 11:45 by this time) and foster was very nearly heartbroken at the loss of his favorite green crock. rowan was still traumatized and clung to me as if the ground was hot lava.

i picked them both up and started the long walk back.

past the clean and pleasant mothers with their clean and pleasant children picnicing nearby.
past the noon crowd at the playground (all 50 of them standing along the fence line).
i could feel their gazes.
i could feel my own horror at what a sight we must be.

me. pants rolled up to no avail, covered in mud walking barefoot. carrying two very loudly screaming children.
oh the horror.

by the time we made it to the car, i could scarcely formulate a game plan to get us home amidst our mud strewn extremities.

i learned my lesson.

goodbye haughty "i'm a great mom" attitude.
hello shoes with laces for future mud walking :)


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