it's friday. finally.

the close of a long week.
ah. breathe.
i've been having one of those "if i can just get to friday, i'll be ok" weeks
somehow i end up with so much going on, i forget i am allowed to breathe.
i woke up this morning and decided i would forget about all of the packing (we're moving this weekend to my parents house) and lesson planning and craft show prep and orders that i need to finish and the dinner i'm making for a friend who just had a baby and 4 loads of laundry and a mounting pile of paperwork i need to sort through before we move and the shower i haven't had yet and the 7 phone calls i need to make and the unretunred library book that is a week overdue and the supplies i need from joanns and the homemade Christmas project i'm working on and the 15 items i need to find time to list on etsy. the list could continue into the next millennium.

when did life get so crazy? or maybe when did i let things get so out of control?

i whine to my husband that i haven't sat down in weeks, or even months. granted, i do like to whine. somehow it makes me feel better. i'm sure he would agree that i doesn't really help him very much to listen to it :)

i used to spend at least and hour or 2 most nights watching E! or bravo or some sort of scrubs or the office re-runs on tv each night. i would savor a bowl of ice cream and perhaps a glass of sangria in my comfy pants. yeah, i would fold laundry or meander about cleaning this or that, or prepping dinner, or organizing, but somehow i rarely felt stressed out from the vast quantity of things i was juggling. i could prioritize. i could balance.

but now, i just find myself always juggling. never ever sitting or resting or stopping. i have so many things up in the air at one time, but i can't seem to hold one of them long enough to finish it before i loose track of the other ones and they fall out of control.
so i juggle.
they are all up there floating, only touching my hands for a moment.
then another gets thrown in, and another, each one adding less time i get with the other balls in the air.
somehow i need to decide to let them fall, so i can hold on to a few and do them well.

it's control. it's me, wanting control.
i need to let them fall on my own, before i get knocked over by something else because i am so busy juggling that i can't look around at my surroundings.

so here's to a day with no juggling.
it's friday. i'm going to pretend it's a day of rest :)