i'm starting a new blog...

it's called "yes that just happened. the embarrassing life of ang."
ok, not really.
but i keep coming up with moments that prove to embarass me to new heights.
last week it was spilling a gallon of coffee during the first day of school assembly.
and today, well, let me tell you about today.

have you ever found yourself unexpectedly overcome with emotion at the most inopportune time? among the top 5 worst places to cry uncontrollable, during a 3 hour invasive root canal ranks high at the top. perhaps surpassed only by sputtering sobs during your Oscar night thank you speech on national television, or whilst snorkeling in the Bermuda triangle (i actually have a personal tear filled account of just such an occasion....perhaps another entry for my new blog :).

i'm not sure if it was the shockingly large root canal/crown price tag that had me all chocked up, or a conundrum of pent up tears just waiting to jump out at me with their unwarranted appearance, but there i sat. 5 dental tools looking down my tonsils, mr. thirsty and a drill bit longer than one used for the panama canal...overcome with tear wrenching sobs. the shounder shaking kind. my gross dentist neck napkin was soaked from all my tears.

as i attempted to get myself under control, i kept apologizing to the dental professionals, who, through my novocaine and giant gaping tooth hole seemed to take pity on me and my tears. at one point, she handed me a tissue and said, "rough week, hu honey?" and they kept working. it wasn't the root canal. ok, a little of it was the root canal, but the pain wasn't from my tooth. i think in all of the stress of late, i forgot to feel the pain. i forgot that it's ok to feel what i am going through and still have a full and trusting spirit. through my tears, they kept working. after all, i really don't need a broken tooth and a broken tear duct. one needs repair and perhaps the other needs a vacation :)
as the drill groaned, i realized it kept going no matter how many times my tear ducts acted up. i cried, but it kept drilling. the cavity in my root structure has to come out. they can't leave any behind. i would surely be in a lot more pain later down the road if the decay remained.
so bring it on. i may cry, but don't stop drilling. i want to be whole at the end, not still needing repair.