LOA

an acronym that sounds like something teeny bopper texters are zapping back and forth...

but in my world, it means a HUGE step in our adoption progress...our Letter of Approval (shortened from the real name, which is Letter of Seeking Confirmation from Adopter = LOSCFA :) goodness. add in our I-800. I-800A. I-864W. Artical 16. DS-230. DS-1981. and the list goes on...the vast number of forms and form names that make no rational sense in the adoption process is mind boggling.

but this...the LOA. the text messaging name. it's my favorite.

you know why? because i have been dreading it. it's a HUGE step, but because of our living situation, we are still waiting on a second homeland security approval in order to return our signed LOA. i have been hoping and praying the homeland security would come in first. but is hasn't.
so now, i will pray for faith. for an added abundance of faith. faith that God has this under control. that we aren't behind. that we won't miss a single possible day without our daughter. that i can release my heart racing palpitations. that the earth rocking anxiety pains i am feeling will subside. that i can stop shaking with nervous anticipation.

this is a blabbering post...but i need to document it for me. for emery.
i'm coming for you sweetie.
your Father has not forgotten you.
i can't do anything to change this process.
i can't do anything more than i am doing.
i'm letting Him do the rest.
and i'll come for you right when i am supposed to.
my sweet sweetie pie.
today i cried a lot for you.
i cried because i don't have you.
and maybe you are crying because you don't have me.
soon and very soon...we can cry together...tears of joy at our family complete.
it is a day that will be sooner than i realize. yet still too far away.
LOA. Love of Adoption. because no matter how hard or difficult or confusing, it leads me to you. and i love it.