6.05.2011

and then i screamed at a total stranger

have you ever heard the cautionary tale which warns ladies not to sit in a parked car in the parking lot, for fear that someone would open the door and rob you? well, it's one of those scenarios that always stuck with me. if i happen to take a parking lot moment to recalculate my to-do list, or shoot a text message, i frequent my rear view mirror in hopes of catching a seedy burglar sneaking up, so i can speed out of the parking lot in the nick of time.

today, my cautionary tale training did me no good.

rowan and i took a jaunt to produce junction. after picking up $9.50 cents worth of produce (but only bringing $9 with us) we were blessed by a kind gent in line, who offered us the .50 cents we needed. we were happily chatting as we got into the car, and i was looking back at him from the drivers seat as we cheered at how exciting it is to see God provide for us, even in something as simple as .50 cents.

suddenly, my drivers side door flung open and a lady shoved her way to get into the car, as if to swiftly attack.

before i could compute the situation, i heard the most shrill and awful scream that has ever graced the produce junction parking lot. little did i know, i was the one screaming. i was face to face with my attacker and only a mere 3 seconds away from punch-flailing her to smithereens.
with a shocked look, she said "oh, i'm sorry, i thought this was my car! i have the same one." she pulled back the half of her body that was nearly sitting on my lap, and walked away.

i had no words. none. i couldn't even mutter "oh, no problem. sorry i screamed bloody-murder right in your face."

i realized that had she been a real attacker, at least i know my high-volume scream exists. perhaps i should dial it down until i know for sure an attack is eminent before assaulting an unsuspecting car-disillusioned lady.

i looked back at rowan, who laughed and said "you scream loud mommy!"


11 comments:

  1. That is SOOOOO funny. I'm sitting here laughing at the picture. So funny because it wasn't a tragedy. Thanks for the laugh this morning. You're adorable.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Totally laughing out loud at that one! Glad it ended on a funny note, I was waiting for some awful tale.

    ReplyDelete
  3. LOL!!! "You scream loud Mommy." That's good. (Madelyn just told me the other day that I need to clean more...) No - keep screaming. It's good practice in case the real thing happens. (I practice this: "In the name of Jesus Christ, get away from me Satan!" b/c that I think will/would be a better weapon than a gun.) Love you miss you - Mindy

    ReplyDelete
  4. Well, good to know that you have no need for a weapon in your car to defend yourself. You carry your weapon with you all the time, lady. Where was the 50-cent man? Why didn't he hear your scream and run to rescue you for the poor lady? :)

    ReplyDelete
  5. This.is.hysterical...even more so since I can totally see this happening to me...and reacting the same way. :)
    Thank you for making me laugh...even after walking away from the computer. :)

    ReplyDelete
  6. Oh my gosh Angie... this is hysterical! I was laughing out loud reading it! Glad it was just a 'car-disillusioned lady' and not a real attacker. :)

    ReplyDelete
  7. Paul and I are laughing so loud. Such a well written post that I can picture this situation exactly! That is so hilarious, I will be laughing about this for days. Love you Ang!

    ReplyDelete
  8. I know that it must have been terrifying....but I can't stop laughing :) Glad she wasn't an attacker!

    ReplyDelete
  9. still laughing after reading that five minutes ago.

    ReplyDelete
  10. oh my goodness, did this post ever give me a good laugh! and I needed a good laugh today. I love your little boys response to the whole situation! :)

    ReplyDelete
  11. oh dear heavens! OH DEAR ROWIE! he's the absolute cutest and you are the absolute funniest.

    ReplyDelete

LinkWithin

Blog Widget by LinkWithin